what am i really scared of?
I'm scared that one day, I'll meet someone that will give me a reason to love life. Someone that will help me to view my past in a much kinder way. Someone who will encourage me to see the positives that life has to offer.
Even when things go wrong, and I have breakdowns and whatever, that someone will come and tell me that it's all going to work out. Every pain, abuse and hurt I've felt in the past is nothing compared to the joy I'll experience tomorrow.
That frightens me. Because my pain has been great. My sorrows are many. How could the joy of the future be better than the pain of the past?
Truth be told, I've already met this person. And I've been beefing them ever since. They give me the room to be angry, to be annoyed, even when it's irrational. They allow me to throw stuff at them, to yell and scream, and to denounce their existence at times.
They still remain. Their promise is always true. The joys of tomorrow will be better than the sorrows of the past. It's hard to believe, but it doesn't even require my belief to come truth. The truth is so powerful, it doesn't need others to uphold it.
"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." Psalms 30:5